Model for your child by demonstrating appropriate behaviour and how to achieve it. Notice and comment when children display the behaviours you want them to develop. Model using self-talk, for example: "No, no", "no touch" or "hot" and acknowledge their attempts to manage their own behaviour.
The Office of Planning Research and Evaluation Report in North Carolina, USA, reviewed 102 studied preventive interventions targeting self-regulation development in early childhood between 1989 and 2013. Across these studies, two approaches were most used to promote self-regulation, either alone or in combination: (1) teaching caregivers how to co-regulate, and (2) providing children with age-appropriate skills instruction.
Parental co-regulation was found to be the most effective means of developing self-regulation with infants and toddlers. Co-regulation involves:
(1) Providing a warm and responsive relationship where children feel respected as individuals, comforted and supported in times of stress, and confident that they will always be cared for. This positive relationship will promote self-efficacy and allow children to feel secure enough to practise new skills and learn from mistakes.
(2) Structuring the environment by having consistent and predictable routines to allow children to feel safe to explore.
(3) Teaching and coaching self-regulation skills through modelling, instruction, opportunities for practice, prompts for skill enactment, and
- Murray, Desiree W., Rosanbalm, Katie, Christopoulos, Christina, and Hamoudi, Amar (2015). Self-Regulation and Toxic Stress: Foundations for Understanding Self-Regulation from an Applied Developmental Perspective. OPRE Report #2015-21, Washington, DC: Office of Planning, Research and Evaluation, Administration for Children and Families, U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. (Level III)